This past October, Professor David Levy at the University of Maastricht in the Neatherlands made a chilling announcement: "My forecast is that around 2050, the state of Massachusetts will be the first jurisdiction to legalize marriages with robots." No doubt Professor Levy then excused himself to overdose, right? Wrong. He seems genuinely excited at the prospect. He continued, and I am not making this up, "once you have a story like 'I had sex with a robot, and it was great!' appear someplace like Cosmo magazine, I'd expect many people to jump on the bandwagon." My reaction to this statement is that it's pretty obvious that people who have sex with robots have either cannot get laid whatsoever, have some sort of uncontrollable sex addiction, or both. I would doubt that people would readily admit to this behavior, but, like so many things in this mixed up world, I would be wrong. Meet "Zoltan," a 33 year-old man who works at an arcade, lives with his parents, and f*cks robots. No, his "relationship" doesn't stop with the banging, he's straight up in love with them and is supposedly married to one of them. I would go into the details but there's just way too much going on in there. I recommend you read the entire interview: these are the people we're up againstSo what does this mean for you? Everything. Don't forget that robots are among us, and that people appear to experience loving relationships with them. For all you know, you could be in love with a bot and not even know it. Watch out for the warning signs (particularly mechanical genitalia, I cannot stress this enough). Also, make sure this isn't your girlfriend.
If you are experiencing technosexual thoughts, please contact us and we will send you a free pamphlet to assist your fight against this horrible affliction.
UPDATE: Robots will probably rape you BTW.
